I was a strange, strange little person.  Some might argue that I still am, but that’s not the point.

There are things throughout your life that you think you want or need.  Things that you think are cool.  Things that are cool until you have them and you experience a paradigm shift so severe that your outlook completely changes.

Casts.  

(See how she looks so happy and cool and has so many friends?!)

As a child, I always wanted to break a bone so I could get a cool colored cast and have all my friends sign it.  I also wanted to break my right hand because then I wouldn’t have to do my homework because I couldn’t write.  But after numerous sprains and stress fractures, I have gotten the gist of being miserable, not being able to join in activities and in some cases, being helpless.   At the age of 25, I have still never actually broken a bone needing a cast.  

Crutches.  

(This was me for the first 10 minutes after getting crutches.)

Always thought crutches would be super cool and badass because, well, you didn’t have to really walk and people would help you and stuff.  One summer, when I was a camp counselor in Maine, I snapped my ankle suddenly in the middle of the wilderness.  Thank god for worker’s compensation!  I was placed on crutches and put in an air cast.  About 20 minutes later I realized that I did not want crutches.  Crutches were a work-out.  Crutches hurt.  Get. Me. Off. These. Crutches.

The Barbie Jeep.

(This was never me.)

 I always wanted one of those electric-powered cars that you could  drive around.  Obviously, this was my choice of vehicle although I probably would’ve taken the lesser-pink boys’ version.   I was always so jealous of my friends that had them, and always devastated when they needed re-charging.  I never got one.   I finally got a big kids’ version when I turned 16… in the form of a 1999 Saturn SL2.  

   

Glasses.  

(If only I looked this good…)

In 3rd grade, I thought glasses were cool.  I told my parents I was having trouble seeing the chalkboard (even though I wasn’t!), so they took me in for an eye exam.  I left the optometrist that day with a shiny new pair of dorky glasses.  I was elated.  Glasses were interesting. Glasses were cool.  Or so I thought. 

Contacts.

 Screw glasses; Contacts were where it was at!  No more “four-eye” jokes.  No more worries that a stray basketball could send shards of glass into my eyeballs.  I got contacts.  It took me 45 minutes to put them in for the first time.  I obviously got better at it.   Then April 2010 happened, and after a night of partying and falling asleep in my contacts, I took them out too quickly…. taking pieces of my cornea with it.  The most blinding and horrible pain ever quickly ensued, followed by a trip to the ER here in Korea.  My eyes have never been the same since.  Contacts have never quite fit right. Contacts have irritated my eyes ever since. 

LASIK.  

(This was the most terrifying experience of my life).

Just last week, I decided it was time.  I was tired of wearing glasses or contacts.  Contacts were painful, glasses were ugly.  I finally had enough disposable income and resided in a country where the surgery was half the price of the USA.  I just about peed my pants I was so excited.  But once under the knife, I cursed out my doctor and then professed my love to him.  It was terrifying.  I was frozen in fear the whole time.  It hurts like hell.  I was such a baby.  But it was successful and I now have near-perfect vision (i’m still healing), without the aid of glasses OR contacts!

So after all these years…. I finally got what I wanted.  And I’m glad I got it.